Block in my Journey

Have you ever just been walking around going about your everyday life, when all of a sudden, you imagine yourself in the same environment, but facing a different situation? Your mind comes up with this image and you do not know where it comes from. I’ve learned from class that this is the unconscious and conscious working together. One of my experiences is when I use staircases in buildings. When I walk through staircases with closed doors at each level of the building, my heart starts pounding and I get an image in my head of reaching the next level and not being able to open the door because it is locked. This has not always happened. It only started happening near my last couple of years of high school.

Whether I am with others or by myself walking through these types of staircases, when I get the image in my head, I am always alone. I would be calmly walking towards the door in front of me and when I reach the door, it would always be locked. My heart rate increases as I reach the door and when it doesn’t open, I start panicking and not knowing what to do to get out. I would run back to the previous level to open that door, but it is also locked. Usually by the time I reach the door in reality, I am banging on the closed door in my mind. The whole time I am walking up the stairs in reality, my heart is racing and the only thing I see is the closed door in front of me. When I reach the door, it always opens because that’s how staircase doors are supposed to be, but in my mind, I always get scared that it won’t open.

When this first started happening, I didn’t really notice and I didn’t wonder why, but after a few months, I thought about it and I had thought I found the reason why it was happening. When I was a little girl, I was in a building with my mom. We had to go down a level on the building and we took the stairs. When we got to the level, the door was locked. We went back up to the floor we were on, but that door was locked too. I remember being so scared that we would be trapped there, but my mom knocked on the door and someone on the other side opened it. Originally, I thought this was the reason for my sudden reaction to these kinds of staircases and didn’t worry about it. However, reading Man and His Symbols by Carl Jung and learning about it in class, I’ve begun to think about it more.

Doing a bit of research, staircases usually mean a journey or path in life that you are about to take or have taken and locked doors usually means something blocking that journey or path. As I mentioned before, this reaction started happening around my last couple of years of high school, which are the years where I had to start thinking about my future and what I wanted to do with it. I was unsure about my whole future and I was scared that everyone else would move on in their lives, but I would still be in the same spot, watching them as they planned and lived their lives. I was scared of being left behind and not knowing what to do with my future, but nowadays, I don’t think it happens as much or if it does, I don’t notice it anymore.

No matter how the scene plays out in my mind, in reality, I know I’ll be able to open that door and if I wasn’t able to someone will be there to help me along the way.

Take the Blame

When asking someone in America why they don’t vote, the most common response is probably, “I don’t have time,” but how can that be when we are allowed some time off work in order to make it to the polls to vote? We are able to vote by mail or go to the polls to vote. Voting by mail allows us to vote when we do have time and dropping our votes off would take less than a minute. Actually going to the polls on Election Day to vote would not take a long time, but still, people use the excuse of time. As citizens, it is our duty to vote on issues that come up in our city, but most people choose not to.

There are other reasons that people say they don’t vote, such as thinking their vote does not matter, not knowing enough about the issues to vote, or just simply being lazy. These reasons may be true, but when results from these elections are put into effect, it affects everyone, including those that do not vote. Many people end up not being happy with the results, but they chose not to vote for their views.

I think one of the reasons people do not vote is because, subconsciously, we do not want any part of the blame when something goes wrong. With politics, there is a lot of blaming of the other party and no one wanting to take blame. If we do not vote, we can blame the others that did vote for the issue that did not help the city or the political leader that is doing a bad job. When things go wrong, people like to blame the government and those who voted the people into power. It is much easier for people to blame others rather than taking the blame yourself and learning from the mistakes that happened. If you don’t vote, you take none of the blame and feel you can blame others and complain about others, but that is not the case because you chose not to make your voice heard until it was too late. Not voting just gives a better chance for things not to go your way because the people who do vote may not have the same opinions as you. What may be hurting you could actually be helping others.

By choosing to not vote, you choose not to use your voice. If you vote and the law or person you vote for does not win, at least you took a stance and choose to try to make a difference. Every law passed or person voted into power will affect the way you live, so why not take a few minutes out of your day to make your voice heard? I feel that people do not have a right to complain if they did not even take the time to vote for what they believe in. Many people just like to complain and do nothing about it, but when the time comes to vote again, they will choose not to vote again and this endless cycle of complaining and not voting will happen. If you complain about the problems, but do not at least try to change it, by voting, nothing will get done.

The consequences of our choice to not vote would be the way the laws affect our own lives and the environment around us. People only complain when laws don’t go our way and don’t help us. By choosing not to vote, you show that you do not care about what happens around you or to you.

If voting appealed to the average person more, I think more people would take the time to vote. The affects of different laws should be explained and shown to people so that people can have an opinion about whether or not they like the outcomes of the law. If they don’t like the outcomes, I think more people would be willing to go out and vote against it because they know they won’t like the outcome and can stop it from happening. On the other hand, if people do like the outcomes of a law, they can go out and vote for it to pass because others could be voting against it. If people are shown beforehand how things will play out, I think they will be much more willing to vote to make the change or not.

Choices

“The Guest” by Albert Camus has elements of the different units we have had during class. The story brings together an example of personal caves, objectivity, and truths that each person is involved in and how they all are connected.

Balducci treats the prisoner as a lesser being because he is a prisoner and he does not give himself the chance to learn more about the prisoner. The prisoner committed a crime, so he does not deserve to be treated with respect, in Balducci’s opinion, even though he does not know the whole story. The prisoner is stuck in a cave of committing his crime and being punished for it. He acts cautiously around Daru because he does not know what Daru is thinking, but he does not have hatred for him just because Daru is required to turn him in.

Daru has the tough decision of whether or not to turn in the prisoner. He is stuck in a cave where he wants nothing to do with the prisoner, but at the same time, is in charge of turning him in. When Daru first meets the prisoner, he does not have any judgments of him. He treats the prisoner, as Fromm says we should treat everyone, objectively. Through the objectivity, he treats the prisoner with respect and in return, the prisoner respects him and does not try to kill him. Daru has to face the truth that whether he turns in the prisoner or not, he will be punished, so he gives the prisoner the choice instead.

The prisoner ends up turning himself in because he did not want to run. The prisoner faces his truth that he murdered his cousin and he is willing to take his punishment. Daru on the other hand, knows the truth, but chooses to stay at his school, which is away from other people, so he can avoid the truth as long as possible.

“The Guest” gives us examples of how different people act around one situation. It has examples of how we should act, according to the units we have talked about in class, and how we shouldn’t act. This story lets the reader see the different perspectives and attitudes revolving around one situation and how different they can all be.

A Lesson from Children

Before I could start volunteering at the YMCA Preschool, I had to meet with the person in charge of the volunteers, who later became my supervisor. I had not volunteered in a few years and did not know what to expect, so I was a little bit nervous. I always try to enter situations as objectively as I can, but as I take in my surroundings, they affect how I relate to who I talk to. When I entered the preschool, it was a bit small, but cozy and there was art by the kids hanging on the wall. I started to get the feeling that this was a very friendly place and that I shouldn’t be nervous.

I did not want to have any judgments about the people there because I would be working with them and did not want my, what could be false, perceptions to get in the way of actually getting to know everyone. When I met my soon-to-be supervisor, I was greeted very warmly and enthusiastically. The interview was very short and did not let me get to know everyone there, but that happened as I volunteered. I think my supervisor was trying to be as objective as possible too because she was trying to get to know me during the interview. It definitely helps if both people in the conversation try to be object and not judge each other. The process to get to know one another goes much more smoothly if there is as little bias as possible and each person tries to put themselves in the other’s position.

I knew that working at a preschool would be a different experience for me. In a preschool, it is not about you, it is about the kids and helping them learn and grow. At one point during my interview, one of the kids interrupted and I was able to see that the number one priority at a preschool is to help the kids and making responsible choices when they are involved. I think working at a preschool definitely helps with humility because with kids, they don’t care about your status, they just want to play with you and have fun. Kids will accept you if you just talk to them and you do not have to worry about what they think of you. My first time meeting all the kids, I had to get used to that and after a while, I would try to approach people with the objectivity of a child.

I think that my supervisor and all the other teachers being around the children for so long helped them approach people objectively and see the best in others. I feel that is why they were able to accept me so quickly and not push for anything I wasn’t comfortable with.

Being with my friends, sometimes we might not get along, but I always think back to my volunteering days and try to see things in their perspective, keeping in mind the other’s best interest. If I get nervous about a conversation, I just think about taking things objectively and getting everyone’s point of view, rather than solely focusing on myself. If I am able to do that, problems can be solved much easier and everyone would be able to learn and grow from these lessons. Sometimes not everyone wants to cooperate and that makes it more difficult, but if I have the patience to listen carefully, hopefully, my friends will do the same too. A relationship involves more than one person, so if I am the only one willing to try to look at everything objectively, it will be a lot harder and take a lot longer to reach a point of mutual understanding.

A standard of love would be to try to approach things as objectively as possible and to stay patient because it takes time to love someone. I know that it is very hard to stay objective because as Fromm mentions, it is a skill, and most of us do not grow up practicing objectivity. It takes time to learn to be objective, especially since there are so many things that can get in our way, such as our own beliefs and our surrounding area. Since all this takes time, we have to have the patience to get to know each other objectively and be willing to invest time into it. In the modern day, everyone wants things to get done quickly and is not willing to wait for things, but if that time is taken, we can learn about the best in each other and have a relationship that will last and be enjoyed by all involved.

Now and Forever More

It was a challenge trying to find just one favorite song that reflects who I am, but I narrowed down my song choices and chose one. I listen to a lot of Disney movie songs so naturally, I decided to go with one of those. The song I am writing about is ‘You’ll Be In My Heart’ by Phil Collins from the movie Tarzan. I chose this song because I always feel deep emotions when I listen to it. In the movie Tarzan, it relates to a mother and son pair. For me, I relate it to my family, who is one of the most important things in my life and I always try to be there for them. No matter what happens now and into the future I know that I will be there for my family and that they will be there for me. It has always been like that and I do not think that will change.

I never really focus on the background music of the song. The lyrics have a bigger impact on me, but the music and tune of the song is very calming and personal. The lyrics are very comforting and express how I feel about my family. Just as the lyrics say, it does not matter what other people say about my family or me, others just do not understand the bond that I have with my family. My cousins and I have faced some troubles with bullies and others, but we always have each other’s backs and we just ignore them because we know that at the end of the day, we’ll always be there for each other and as long as we have that, we’ll be okay. The lyrics express how people won’t always physically be there for you, but you know in your heart that they are there supporting you and if you ever run into trouble, they will be there. It has always been that way with my family and me even when we are all off doing our own things.

The lyrics that stick with me the most are:

Why can't they understand
the way we feel
They just don't trust
what they can't explain
I know we're different but,
deep inside us
We're not that different at all

These lyrics reflect how a lot of people view the world today. Most people are afraid of things or people because they don’t understand them or believe in them, but everybody is different and has things that not everyone will understand. We all just have to learn to adapt to everyone else’s differences and not be so afraid of them because, as the lyrics say, deep inside, we all have our basic needs and are not as different as we think. Personally, I try my hardest not to judge people when I see them because I know there are many layers to a person and it cannot be recognized just by seeing someone. You have to really get to know a person to know what they are like. I try to do that and I always hope that people will do the same by me, but I know that is a big thing to ask, since not everyone thinks the same way.

Going back to the topic of family, I always hear my friends talking about how they don’t like certain members of their family and how they can’t stand them, but I never understood that feeling because I can barely remember a time when my family was not there for me. Sure, I don’t always get along with my family and we might get upset with each other, but when the time comes, we are there for each other. I do not know what I would do without my family there to support me. They are some of the people who help me put together the pieces of my life. I always try to live with an open mind about thing and accept other people’s differences because they are not bad, they are just different and different can be a good thing. I hope I am able to keep this mentality in the future and be able to continue to support my family and others that are close to me because once they enter my life, they are forever in my heart.

Organs

Before this class, I had never heard of DJ Shadow before, so I did not know what to expect. When I first started listening to DJ Shadow’s Endtroducing, I thought the whole album had a very calm and relaxing mood. Although some of the songs did sound alike to me, my favorite song from the album is Organ Donor. It really stood out to me because of the organ used. I really like the sound of the organ mixed with the drums. When I think of organ music, I think of slow and solemn songs, but this song is upbeat. It is completely different from what I think is typical organ music. The organ parts are a bit slow, but with the drums mixed in, it sounds upbeat. It almost has a dance beat to it when the drums are mixed in. The sound of the last 30 seconds changes a bit and it almost sounds that something that would be background music for a video game.

Is the name of the song a play on the word ‘organ’? When I hear the song, I don’t think of an organ donor or anything related to it. The only relation I can find is the instrument of the organ and the title being a play on words.

The song starts off with a few seconds of something that sounds completely different from the rest of the song. I cannot understand what is said. It sounds as if the song will be a dance song, but it echoes off into the organ music.

Growth

Many people face hindrances to their own growth. I faced a hindrance from my childhood growth through my parents and in Groundhog Day, Phil’s hindrance to growth is himself. In the beginning of the movie, Phil thinks so highly of himself and expects others to treat him like a celebrity that he does not see that he is a jerk. He thinks that the way he acts is fine and sees no reason to change. Phil’s lack of self-evaluation gets in his way of personal growth and becoming a better person.

Once Phil is trapped reliving the same day over and over again, he is able to step back and reevaluate himself because he sees all the ways things go wrong in his life just in that one day. He realizes what a jerk he is, with a little help from Rita. Initially, he fakes being nice to impress Rita, but along the way, the faking turns into genuine kindness and he starts to change for the better.

Phil’s process out of his cave takes years to accomplish. All those times that he had to relive the same day, he was taking steps out of that cave. Each time Phil relived the day, he took different steps so that each day was different and he learned from his previous mistakes. All his steps helped him grow and led him out of his cave. Once he finally got the day right, he was out of his cave and adapted to being out of the cave, too.

Just as Phil lived the day over and over to learn from his mistakes, I must do the same with my everyday life to get out of my cave. Unlike Phil though, I do not get to live the same day over and over until I get it correct, my life will keep going even if I am living it without any growth in my development. I have the added obstacle of my parents adding to the hindrance, but ultimately, I think it will depend on me and how I choose to handle everything that comes my way.